Viking labourers a right carry on, says Barber of Windsor

Paul Barber of Windsor thinks the Vikings that left a sword behind on that Norwegian farm (C8) had probably been doing a bit of fencing.

“Many years ago my late father and mother were planning their first (and only) overseas holiday,” writes John Ure of Mount Hutton. “As they were to visit France, dad decided he would learn the language by going to see some French films at our local arty cinema, listening to the dialogue and reading the subtitles (C8). On their return, dad told me that it worked pretty well, except that whenever anybody spoke to him, he looked at their feet to see what they were talking about.”

Mickey Pragnell of Kiama says his “dear mother-in-law, with advanced dementia, obsessively reads aloud every word she sees on the big aged care common room TV screen: movie, music videos, commercials. Her fellow residents tolerate this. However, a while ago, by some unexpected quirk of programming, the ‘entertainment’ was a foul-mouthed rap artist. Luckily, it wasn’t left on long, but there was mum-in-law innocently reciting every four-letter (and worse) obscenity along with him. One lady beside her was heard to mutter, ‘Oh, steady on, that’s a bit much!’”

“When I first saw the title of that ABC TV show George Manojlovic (C8) referred to, I thought that the last word had been included as a result of a typo and that the correct title was Stuff the British,” says John Lees of Castlecrag.

Jenny Stephenson of Wollongong notes that: “The show hasn’t even aired yet and George is givin’ it a bad rap.” Geddit?

Answering John Munro’s driverless car (C8) question, Dave Lewington of Heathcote doesn’t think John would require a driving licence “but he would require a master’s degree in artificial intelligence.”

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Jack Dikian of Mosman reckons the president should take the win (and the carnal thorns): “The dessert Joe Biden (C8) received sounds deliciously divine, especially when you compare it to the French delicacy, Andouillette, once prepared for Biden’s predecessor. It’s a sausage containing parts of a pig’s colon and is said to have an intense, unusual smell, reminiscent of urine.”

The bottoms are tops, according to Barbara Ryan of Caringbah South: “Regarding Richard Leader’s visit to Foggy Bottom (C8), I don’t know the answer, but meanwhile, my husband and I had an excellent dinner some years ago at the Bricklayers Arms in Hogpits Bottom, Herts, UK.”

Column8@smh.com.au

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