Tori Spelling is letting it all out. Just days after she filed for divorce, she’s opening up about her life post-split. Her estranged husband, Dean McDermott, and she had been together for nearly 18 years.

“I’ve never felt more alone in 50 years,” she confessed. This was during the April 1 debut of her podcast, misSPELLING. Tori was brutally honest, “I don’t feel worth loving. That’s the truth.” She added, “And that’s something that’s just in you. It’s not something I wanted or created.”

The podcast episode was an emotional rollercoaster. Tori, who’s 50, has five kids with Dean, who’s 57. Their names are Liam, 17, Stella, 15, Hattie, 12, Finn, 11, and Beau, 7. She confirmed in the episode that she had just filed for divorce.

Divorces, she noted, can be a messy business. And it’s even more complicated when you’re in the public eye. “There’s this weird thing that I didn’t know about before that you have to be careful with your ex,” she said.

She further explained the complexity of the situation. “It’s a he-said, she-said, who filed first. I had to file and go through the process and then once it was accepted and publicly posted, then I’m allowed to call and fill in my ex.”

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